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Clinical Chemistry 21: 1998-1999, 1975;
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Clinical Chemistry, Vol 21, 1998-1999, Copyright © 1975 by the American Association for Clinical Chemistry

The Double Pelican (A Cautionary Tale)

George F. Grannis 1

1 Department of Pathology, Division of Clinical Chemistry, The Ohio State University, 410 West Tenth Ave., Columbus, Ohio 43210.

Gather Dew in the Month of May, when the Sun is in Aries and the Moon is in Taurus, with a clean white Linen Cloth spread upon the Grass [Figure 1]. Filter the Dew into a clean white Porcelain Pan, and deliver it into the Great Egg. Combine this Dew with Virgin's Milk and Infant's Blood, digest for fourteen Days in Horse Dung, and distill to one quarter its Bulk four times running. This Procedure will yield a potent Spirit of Dew which, if you are truly an Artist, may be used to prepare an Elixir of Wonderful Virtue that will Transmute all Metals, and will cause Old Men to rejoice in their restored Youth and Vigor.

Submitted on August 3, 1975
Accepted on August 10, 1975






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Copyright © 1975 by the American Association for Clinical Chemistry.